A Zombie's History of the United States: From the Massacre by Josh Miller

By Josh Miller

Americans were taught that their country is civilized and humane. yet, too usually, U.S. activities were uncivilized and inhumane.
—Howard Zinn

Shedding gentle on 500 years of suppression, this stunning exposé unearths the pivotal function in American historical past performed through its such a lot invisible minority—zombies.

From colonization and revolution to global Wars and worldwide hegemony, A Zombie’s background of the United States tells the strong and relocating tales of this country’s living-dead underclass, including:

•The zombie bloodbath of eu colonists at Plymouth Rock

•The grotesque killing of a zombinated Meriwether Lewis by means of his fellow explorer William Clark

•The doomed security of the Alamo opposed to hordes of the attacking undead

•The heroic, platoon-saving cost right into a hail of German hearth by way of an undead Lt. Audie Murphy

•The top-secret NASA missions that launched(and usually misplaced) zombies into space

•The anti-terrorist application to prevent the weaponization of the zombie virus

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Additional info for A Zombie's History of the United States: From the Massacre at Plymouth Rock to the CIA's Secret War on the Undead

Sample text

Born in 1770, also in Virginia, Clark had a much different childhood. Unlike Lewis, who was raised a proper gentleman, Clark was of the lesser gentry. Self-educated, though well read, Clark joined the army in 1789 and was to serve largely in Indian affairs. Despite only being twenty-six years old, Clark retired from military life on July 4, 1796, due to poor health. He returned to his family plantation in Kentucky where he would peacefully remain, 62 The Corpse of Discovery until the fateful day an old colleague suggested him for the adventure of a lifetime.

Now, along with the men, Knox also had to safely see countless horses and eighteen pieces of artillery across the Delaware. Though hard going, events were moving, initially, as planned. Things were not going as well for Cadwalader. In a letter to his brother, Washington recounted what Cadwalader had reported: With the Men huddle at the riveredge apparently up rose a pitiful wale from the ranks. The Men had been ordered not yet to arm ther muskettes, lest some discharge accidently. Commotion reigned and soon the Commander learnt it was undead.

Perhaps the rank stench of sickness that has pervaded the camp has summoned them by their foul senses. I do not know. Dear Lucy, never have I seen such a terifying sight. Surely a thousand strong, the Dead fell upon us like a great raw wave. February the 27th How I wish the Red coats were assaulting us. One can rely on a mortal foe to behave accordingly. To use caution. To pause or to retreat. To be woonded. Relentless are the Dead. These attacks were to last for four and a half weeks before the last of the zombies was finally de-animated.

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